Smile on Your Brother

We often quote a famous line written by the English poet John Donne: “No man is an island.” It reminds us that we all need each other and are not fully sufficient on our own. The Bible confirms that we were all created to live in community with others. Even though we have different personalities and inclinations, we were designed to need others and to be better together. Which also means that what we do affects others. We cannot live as if we alone are all that matters. But welcome to the 21^st century.

A firsthand story: My husband just spent the last week at home fulfilling a mandated furlough without pay for all employees at his business in an effort for the company to save some much-needed money and hopefully recover from a very difficult couple of years. This action of the company was precipitated by a lengthy strike by 33,000 of its union employees who have been expecting unrealistic demands to be met before they will return to work and help the company survive. Through no fault of his own, my husband lost 25% of his salary this month while faithfully fulfilling the duties of his management position. The actions of other people affected him and everyone else still willing to work at his company on a daily basis.

Selfishness seems to fuel so much of our society. The company leaders have made selfish decisions and serious financial mistakes in the past leading up to where we are today. The striking workers have been told repeatedly by the union leadership that they have to fight to get what they deserve; and they have been convinced that this is “their time” despite the fact that the company is working hard just to stay afloat. And the union leadership has not even been willing to bring previous offers to the strikers for a vote. Everyone seems to be thinking about themselves and forgetting that we’re all in this together. But what we do affects others. And now the latest news from the company is an upcoming ten percent reduction in the overall workforce that will soon affect everyone company-wide. It seems that when everyone looks out for number one, no one really wins.  

I keep hearing a song from my childhood playing in my head:

Come on, people now
Smile on your brother
Everybody get together
Try to love one another right now.

I guess not much has changed since Chester Powers wrote these words in 1963 and The Youngbloods made them famous in 1967. Humans are self-centered and have to be reminded to work together. And natural loners like myself have to work even harder at this. But we can all do better, and we need to. Now, more than ever.

Blessed By Kindness

I thought she worked for Southwest Airlines. Her “faith, hope, and love” t-shirt should have given me a clue, but I didn’t notice until later. She observed my predicament and humbly served me with kindness. I will never forget her act of love.

I was returning from an amazing trip across the country visiting a dear friend I hadn’t seen in many years. Because of my physical limitations, I always request wheelchair assistance at the airport when I fly. This usually ensures that I am transported to my departure gate and down the jet bridge to the airplane door and then picked up again as I exit the plane at my arrival gate. If there is a layover at another airport along the way, I am guaranteed wheelchair transport between arrival and departure gates. But something else was in store for me on this trip.

As I exited my plane at my layover airport, I was greeted with a wheelchair as expected. But when I got to the end of the jet bridge, I was asked to get out of the wheelchair and to climb up (unassisted) onto a motorized cart that carried six people. Apparently because my departure gate was twenty gates away, this was the preferred transport in order for the airline helper to save steps. I was about to find out just how much this particular worker lacked an attitude of service when he tried to drop me at the wrong gate (and argued with me about it) and then reluctantly stopped at a restroom as I had requested along the way. By the time we reached my actual gate, he was not interested in providing any assistance for me to climb down off of the vehicle. Without moving from the driver seat, he pointed over towards the window at my gate when I asked where my wheelchair was.

Enter my blessing from above. Another passenger on my upcoming flight (who I mistook for an airline employee) noticed my struggle and grabbed a wheelchair to assist me. As I sputtered unneeded words about the rudeness of the actual airline employee, she quietly helped me and asked if there was anything else she could do for me. Thankfully, I later realized my mistake and was able to apologize and express my gratitude.

But this incident got me thinking about my own servant heart. When was the last time I randomly served a stranger, expecting nothing in return? When was the last time I went out of my way to be a blessing to someone else? Am I known for my compassion, kindness, and humility? Food for thought, as there is always room for each of us to improve. 

Blessed By Love

 

A couple of weeks ago, my husband and I both celebrated our birthdays. Only eleven days apart, it always seems each year that our special days come and go quickly only to wait nearly a year for another chance to celebrate. In our extended family, there were seven of eleven birthdays between the end of August and Christmas, so the rest of the year was pretty sparse. And no time for lingering on any one person’s birthday in the Fall!

But this year we have had the opportunity to extend our birthday celebrations a little bit longer. Yesterday, we enjoyed a wonderful afternoon at our son and daughter-in-law’s house in a nearby town that included a delicious custom-planned homemade dinner and dessert prepared by our foodie son in honor of both of our birthdays. And we have been invited by some good friends for a birthday dinner out at a restaurant in the upcoming week. We have been feeling very blessed by the love of those around us.

Jesus told us to love one another (John 15:12) – and then he showed us how to do that by dying for us. Love is hard to get right, because there are so many different ways to do it. There are even different languages of love – different ways to express and receive love. My husband primarily wants words of affirmation, and I mostly want acts of service. So we have to work hard to keep love alive in our marriage.

Loving one another involves putting others first and imagining what would make them feel loved. In other words, it should be intentional. Which means it also needs to be unselfish. My 4-year-old grandson has been learning at preschool about filling other people's empty buckets with things like kindness. He's learning how to intentionally love others.

Today I’m feeling blessed by the love of my son and his wife and looking forward to sharing an evening with our friends. And I am reminded of my responsibility to love others . . . and trying maybe a little harder to think about intentional ways to do just that. 

Here We Go Again

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I am not a political person. And my approach to American politics is probably not popular with most people, regardless of their political party or their values.

But this week I had two very different experiences that were both based in politics. On Tuesday night, I reluctantly watched the presidential debate between this year’s Republican and Democratic nominees. And on Friday, my husband and I went on a date to watch the movie, “Reagan”. These two events were a demonstration of contrasts and produced very different feelings in me.

Yes, I am old enough to have lived through the Reagan era; and yes, I thought he was a good president overall. So to some I’m sure that makes me biased. But I enjoyed watching the movie and reliving a different time in history – a time when at least a few politicians based their values on something outside of themselves. A time when some politicians believed there was a God-ordained right and wrong; and they seemed more interested in doing what was right than just accomplishing their own agendas.

We can no longer say those words about our political candidates today. To say we are a post-Christian nation would be an understatement, and the presidential debate just underscored that truth. As I wrote in both 2016 and 2020, in my lifetime it has become more and more difficult to categorize candidates based on moral character or values, not to mention the policies they stand for. I can no longer find a candidate for president that I respect and agree with using both of these parameters. I can easily argue against both candidates but find it difficult to argue for either of them! So voting is a much more difficult task for me these days. “Lord, give us wisdom!”

Yes, I wish there was a Ronald Reagan running this year; but there isn’t. And no politician is perfect because they are just humans. However, my comfort comes from the truth that no politician is or was intended to be our savior. Only Jesus was capable of accomplishing that work. So I will continue to rest in the truth of God’s sovereignty above anything that happens in America. And I’ll be glad when another election cycle is over and we can watch God’s will for our nation play out, knowing that only He knows who is the best candidate for His purposes in 2024.

                          

Birthday Thoughts

Yesterday was another anniversary of my birth, and it’s got me thinking about the many ways that I have celebrated that day in the past. Mostly I’ve been thinking about how my expectations have changed through the years. It seems that expectations about pretty much everything change the older we get.

I came from a family that celebrated birthdays with warmth and predictability. There was always a homemade dinner and a homemade cake or other dessert. There were always a few presents and an evening of spending time with extended family. But, while these times were special, such certainty excludes creativity and tends to produce expectations. But life is not always as predictable as my childhood birthdays.

Being born at the beginning of September brought with it some unique challenges. My 4^th birthday was spent in a hotel room during an end-of-the-summer family vacation, and my birthday cake was a single chocolate cupcake with candles. My first day of junior high was my 12^th birthday, and I distinctly remember having to correct one of my new teachers after he mispronounced my name during roll call, turning me into a boy instead of a girl. I’m not sure I made a very good first impression that day as I told him with sass, “It’s Michelle – I’m a girl!”

After I became an adult, I quickly figured out the fallacy of the September-through-June ministry year that many churches adhere to. Women’s events usually didn’t start until mid-September or October; so the monthly celebration of birthdays always eluded me. And remember Secret Sisters, where you could sign up to secretly bless another woman in the church for several months of the year? You guessed it – this ministry always ran from October through May . . . so early September birthdays never fit the timeframe. But enough about immature expectations.

Aging helps us to be more realistic . . . and to be more grateful for simpler and less selfish things. So this birthday I am thankful that I am still here and relatively healthy nearly 32 years after having treatment for cancer. I am thankful for the ability to go out to eat at a nice restaurant with my husband. I am thankful for brightly-colored birthday flowers. I am thankful for the privilege of talking with my children on the phone on my special day and to Skype with my four grandchildren as well. I am grateful for the sweet voice of my 4-year-old grandson spontaneously singing “Happy Birthday” to Grandma. I am thankful for the dear friends who sent me birthday messages or cards and for the birthday phone call from my brother. I am thankful that I have so much more to be thankful for.

 

 

And I am thankful for cheesecake . . . because cheesecake is always a good way to celebrate your birthday!