Lasting Friendships

Over the weekend, my friends and I attended our 50^th high school reunion, posing again for a photo as we had fifty years earlier on our graduation night. Of course we don’t look the same as we did, but hopefully the resemblance is still detectable!

 

As I looked around the room at my reunion and talked to others from my class that I hadn’t seen in decades, I thought about why my two closest friends during high school and I have continued to remain friends throughout our lives. We didn’t follow identical paths after we left school, we don’t agree on everything, and we don’t see each other very often in person. In many ways, we have had vastly different life experiences from one another. 

But we have history and years of memories that no one else has been there for. We have always accepted each other as we are and learned and grown from each other’s varied experiences and beliefs. As we have shared life’s ups and downs through the years, our friendship has deepened beyond memories of high school shenanigans. Even though we each have had many other friends in our separate lives, we still feel at home when we are together and seek to maintain our original friendship. 

The past is where we started and what ties us to each other, despite our differences. But what has held our friendship together through the years is the choice to continue to connect with one another when we can and to keep supporting each other even as we live separate lives.

Social media has changed the meaning of the word “friend”; but true friends are deeper than the number of people who “like” our posts. They are the ones who stick close no matter what life brings. I know our trio has less future ahead of us than the years of our past; but I also know that we will not face it alone. Whatever may come, we will still be friends and walk together. And I am very grateful for that. 

The Seasons of Life

 

In many ways it doesn’t seem possible that it has been as long as it has. In other ways it is easy to believe that so much time has passed. Tomorrow will mark the 50^th anniversary of my graduation from high school!

 

It was a very cold and windy night as we sat on our school’s football field and waited to move our tassels. It was the day we had been looking forward to for many years. For some, it was bittersweet: high school was the pinnacle and would always be looked back on as the best time of their lives. But for most of my friends, graduation meant moving into the next phase of life and leaving childhood behind . . . and for many leaving our small town behind. After the ceremony, we attended the modest senior party planned by graduates and their parents at a hotel in a nearby city; and then we went our separate ways. 

There were reunions over the years, but many of the people on that football field never saw each other again. After twenty years of life, my core group of high school friends decided to start meeting annually for lunch . . . which we have continued for nearly thirty years; but there are so many others whose lives have never intersected with mine for fifty years.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

I think back to all the people I knew in high school, and I wish they could know me now. I think I’m a better person now and have matured, and my guess is that they have grown, too. I’m a college graduate, a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a writer, and a cancer survivor. I didn’t choose a career outside the home, but I have used my God-given gifts in church ministry all of my adult life. I have had struggles and difficulties that have threatened to undo me, but God has walked beside me through it all and given me a deeper faith and a unique perspective on what following him means. I suspect that many of my former classmates also have similar stories to tell that show resilience and hope in the face of life’s challenges. 

Personally, I would have liked to avoid some of my life experiences. Not all of them were pleasant, and part of me wishes that there had been less troubles and more peace. I am one who likes things to stay the same, so every change I have been through has been hard for me. But the fifty years since I launched into adulthood have taught me that every difficulty has helped to make me who I am today. Much of my life today looks like I was hoping for on that graduation night; but I didn’t foresee everything that I have experienced. However, the hard times have better molded my character than the easier ones as God has faithfully taught me and grown me along the way. So while I wish I could erase the mistakes I’ve made, I honestly wouldn’t change any of the difficult things I have experienced . . . because they have added a depth to me that was missing at my high school graduation. 

My youngest grandchild graduated from Kindergarten a couple weeks ago. He has so much of his life ahead of him still; and all he wants to do at this point in his life is get bigger and keep up with his older siblings. If he'd listen, I would tell him to try and enjoy every step along the way . . . because all of his life experiences are designed by God to build his character and to grow him into the type of man God wants him to be someday. He won’t be there yet when he graduates from high school in twelve years; but if he keeps walking with God he will be well on his way toward a lifetime of growth and continued maturity.

Life is full of changing seasons, and we can face them with joy and faith or with fear and worry. And who we become in the end will depend on which of those paths we choose.

Awkward Trees

 

I was sitting in line at the pharmacy drive-up window like I have dozens of times before when I saw the tree. Maybe it was because it was a bright sunny day, but I’m surprised I hadn’t ever noticed it before. Its awkward, man-made shape caught my attention – even though I’ve seen the same sort of thing before. In order to keep the electrical wires safe that had invaded the tree’s habitat, workers had severely cut back the branches, leaving a gaping hole in the middle of one side of the tree. 

I’m not much of a gardener, but I know that proper pruning of plants and trees can actually make them healthier. The same is true for humans. In John 15:2, Jesus likened his followers to grapevines and told his disciples that God the Father prunes every branch that bears fruit so that we (the branches) will produce even more fruit. Pruning can hurt for a moment, but in the Father’s loving hands it always brings about his purposes and what is best for us. 

But I’m not sure that what happened to the tree I was looking at could be classified as “proper” pruning! And yet the tree continued to grow and appeared to be very healthy. Sometimes we as humans get “cut back” by forces outside our control – things in life that just happen to us because we live in a fallen world. People mistreat us, natural phenomena occur, and health issues happen. Life doesn’t always treat us “fairly”, whatever that is. We get pruned, but not necessarily by loving hands. 

How do we respond when these things happen? Do we, like the tree, continue to grow and be healthy? Or do we wither and die? We can become bitter and useless, or we can trust that God is sovereign and holds us in his hand, no matter what happens to us. Whether the pruning comes directly from him or from another source, we can be sure that God is not surprised and is fully capable of bringing about growth in our lives through it all. We just have to choose to respond in a way that pleases him and look to him to make sense out of what life throws our way. He is the only one who can take what we call “bad” and bring “good” out of it (Romans 8:28). 

Like the tree, we may look a little different than those around us and feel like part of us is missing; but we will still be healthy and able to bear fruit again for his kingdom. And that’s all that really matters in the end.

Redeeming the Time

 

It’s probably partly due to the way I am wired, but we just had one of my least favorite days of the year. It’s not because I might lose an hour of sleep; it’s because I lose an hour of time. The day in the fall when we set our clocks back one hour is my happy day, but the day that we “spring ahead” by setting our clocks forward one hour always rubs me the wrong way. 

I am a “doer”, and I am most fulfilled when I am accomplishing tasks or checking things off a list. So losing an hour of time to “do” has never set well with me. It always feels like the days are too short as it is, so I don’t like to have any less than 24 hours in any day. However, that doesn’t mean I always use all of my time in the best possible way. 

The Bible reminds us of how short our lives really are and encourages us to use our time wisely. Everyone will interpret that concept differently, and we all need some “down time” and time for leisure – especially in our fast-paced 21^st century western culture. But most of us could do a better job at finding that balance and making sure that we are devoting our time in ways that advances the kingdom of God. 

There’s no formula to follow and no perfect examples to emulate. We are all inclined to waste time or to use it selfishly. But Ephesians 5:15-16 is a good reminder to us of how we should be viewing time and how we should approach the decisions we make about how we use it: 

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” (ESV)  

Every one of us can always improve how well we use our time; but consulting God and listening to his voice through every part of each day will help us make choices that honor him and further his kingdom. And I have often found that when I put God’s priorities ahead of my own during any given day, the time actually seems to move more slowly and I am able to accomplish much more. I believe this is the blessing of God for me when I choose to put him first. 

So whether I get an extra hour in the fall or lose an hour in the spring, I need to make sure that all of the hours given to me are used in ways that are pleasing to God and make a difference for his kingdom, doing everything “for the glory of God” (1 Corinthians 10:31).

Finishing Well

 

The 2026 Winter Olympics have officially come to an end after seventeen days of athletic competition across sixteen different sports disciplines – with a total of 116 events. Wow! No wonder I’m kind-of burned out and ready to do something else with my evenings for a while! But even though I was never an athlete, I do enjoy watching these participants competing at such a high level; and I am always amazed at what they are able to accomplish. There were many stunning victories and a few unexpected defeats. Many of the athletes had both high moments and disappointing ones. 

Watching the Olympics always reminds me of what the Christian walk is like. Sometimes we too have stunning victories, and sometimes we also have unexpected defeats. We can find ourselves losing our focus sometimes, bringing disappointing results. And other times we are able to see God working through us to accomplish things we could never do on our own. There are many times when the Bible refers to the Christian life as a race, encouraging us to finish well. 

My family always chuckles when we hear those words, because my husband spoke them often to our sons before they left home for good. We never expected either of them to be the best at whatever they did, but we did expect them to always do their best. So my husband would remind them to “finish well” in whatever endeavor they were pursuing. 

There are lots of things outside ourselves that can affect our pursuit to finish well in the Christian walk. In fact, Satan’s main agenda is to keep us from finishing well so that God’s kingdom is negatively affected. Just like the athletes in the Olympics, we cannot lose our focus or get distracted by the things that happen to us in this life if we expect to finish well. This is the reminder that the writer of Hebrews gives us in chapter 12, verses 1 and 2: 

“. . . let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.” 

You see, Jesus has already run the race before us; and he has already won. So keeping our focus on him and choosing to avoid anything that slows us down is the only way to finish the race well. And the next verse after this says that fixing our eyes on Jesus is what will keep us from becoming weary or from losing heart while we run the race. These words are encouraging to me and give me the hope that I need to finish well.

Near the end of his life, the apostle Paul was able to write these words to a young man he was mentoring: “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith” (2 Timothy 4:7). May the same be able to be said of you and me at the end of our lives because we finished well!

We Did It!

Yesterday was a big day for just about everyone in the area where I live. After eleven long years, our local professional football team returned to the Super Bowl to play for what is referred to as the “world championship” of that sport. And we won! 

I’m not a die-hard sports fan, but I do enjoy watching a good football game when our team is playing well. My personal team experience is limited, as I never played sports or competed in any other scenarios on a team. My only team experience was many years of serving as a member of our church worship team, which is different than the team sports experience. 

I’ve also been starting to watch the Olympics that are currently taking place in Italy, where most of the competitions involve individuals rather than teams. But what I’ve heard repeated by numerous members of the Seahawks football team over the past couple weeks is the idea of teamwork; and it seems that this team has a special connection with each other. Nearly every member of the team that reporters have spoken to has referred to the brotherhood that exists on this team, and it is evident in how they play and how they speak about each other. There truly doesn’t seem to be any “I” in this team. 

There also doesn’t seem to be any separation based on color on this team. That’s probably because many of the players as well as the head coach often mention God and their personal relationships with him. I believe this has had a unifying effect on this team that is not always seen on other teams. 

Our church is located in the fifth most ethnically diverse city in the whole United States, and we are making a conscious effort to become a church that welcomes people of all races. Only the Spirit of God can knit all people groups together into one body of believers who aren’t focused on differences but rather on shared beliefs and common goals. So it is refreshing to see such camaraderie on a secular football team. 

And it challenges all of us to approach those around us who are different with the same acceptance and team attitude that our football team displays. Imagine all we could accomplish for God’s kingdom if we could get that right! 

Broken Vessels

It’s not the first time it’s happened, and I’m sure it won’t be the last. I was packing up the last remnants of the Christmas season when the ornament slipped out of my hand and broke in dozens of pieces on the floor. I was already reminiscing about each of the ornaments as I took them off the tree, since most of our ornaments have sentimental value for one reason or another. But now this memory would be gone forever.

Early in our son’s marriage, my new daughter-in-law and I went to a local Christmas bazaar featuring many handmade crafts and gifts. It was a fun day together, and she bought me the hand-painted ornament that now lay on the floor in pieces. She knew how much I loved pansies and gave it to me as a Christmas gift a few weeks later. I am sad to no longer have this reminder of a good memory.          

But as I cleaned up the broken mess on the floor, I couldn’t help but think about some verses in the Bible that talk about brokenness and the fragile nature of each of our lives. I used to think that only other people were broken; I have discovered in the last twenty years that everyone is broken in some way . . . even me. Thankfully, we are reminded in the Psalms that God is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18) and that he heals them and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3). We also discover that God most desires those who come to him with a broken spirit and a broken and contrite heart (Psalm 51:17). 

Amazingly, it is this willingness to be broken that makes us the most useful for God’s kingdom and purposes. That’s because God can turn brokenness into something even better that can be used for ministry for him. Jeremiah 18:4 tells us about a field trip that God took Jeremiah on in order to teach him how to prophesy to the nation of Israel. He went to visit a potter and witnessed this: “And the vessel he was making of clay was spoiled in the potter’s hand, and he reworked it into another vessel, as it seemed good to the potter to do.” 

God still uses broken or “spoiled” vessels by reworking them into something new that is useful for his purposes. We don’t want to be broken because we don’t always understand what’s best. But God does. And when he looks at us in our “fragile jars of clay”, he sees vessels that can be reworked by him to carry the “treasure” of the gospel message to those around us (2 Corinthians 4:7). This verse goes on to remind us that God’s work through our brokenness is what will bring the glory to him and not to us. 

I can’t bring back the beautiful ornament that was broken. But I can embrace my own brokenness by allowing God to use me “just as I am” to minister to the lives of others “as it seems good to the potter to do”. I’ll always be amazed that this is God’s plan, and I’ll always be humbled to be a part of it. May you and I be faithful whenever he calls.